What do you need to know as a victim?
What if you are a victim of domestic violence. There are certain things you need to know. This is a very serious issue. I take this issue very seriously, and so do judges. The first, and most important thing you need to do is get yourself and your children safe. Get to a safe place. Go to a shelter, if you need to. Find a place where you can regain your strength and make sure you are not in harm’s way.
How do you protect yourself?
After you have found a safe harbor for yourself and your children, the next thing you need to consider is getting an order of protection. You can go down to the court and get one, or hire an attorney that can help you. But that’s important. You really need to get that. And you also need to start filing either your divorce action or move forward with a paternity action as well, to protect you and your children.
Who can be affected?
What if you are a victim of domestic violence? Unfortunately, domestic violence is a common occurrence here in the United States and it spans across all walks of life. Your first priority if you are a victim of domestic violence is to ensure the security and safety of you and your children.
What steps should a victim take?
A victim needs to develop a safety plan. That might include filing a police report, making arrangements to stay with family or friends, obtaining an order of protecting, and those sorts of things.
What action should you take in an extreme situations?
In some extreme situations, a victim may even need to seek out the assistance of a domestic violence shelter, such as the Sojourner Center (sojournercenter.org).
What are the effects/How do you rebuild your life after violence?
Almost immediately, a victim needs to start putting the pieces of their life back together. Regaining some self-confidence and rebuilding their children’s self-confidence, as well.
Some victims don’t even remember what types of clothes they like to wear, and they don’t even remember a time when they had a peaceful dinner.
Most victims forget how to socialize and they have lost touch with their children out of fear of angering the abuser. Some have neglected their own personal hygiene.
What is some advice for victims?
Each situation is different. Some situations involve drug abuse, child abuse, and other sorts of very awful things, so my advise to anyone who has been a victim of domestic violence is to seek counseling for you and your children.
What should you do after the dust settles?
Once the dust settles a bit, I would highly recommend seeking out the services of a competent attorney. One who specializes in domestic violence cases. At that point you can move forward with your paternity or divorce action, can get an order of protection, if you haven’t gotten one already, and have that support system you need and the court orders you need to move on with your life.
Kaine Fisher, Chairman of Rose Law Group Family Law Department, can be reached at kfisher@roselawgroup.com
